A friend of mine died this week. I am going to her funeral, but it seems so after the fact. Why didn't I go last week while she was still alive? Because it would have been expensive and time consuming. But I should have gone. And this is what I would have asked her, "What do you think about Jesus?"
I don't know what she would have said. I think she had nice thoughts about Jesus. But Jesus was kind of an "all or nothing" guy. He did everything for us and offered everything to us. He doesn't want us to have nice thoughts in return. Jesus said to the most perfect and religious people of his day, "You are like whitewashed tombs, which look beautiful on the outside but on the inside are full of dead men's bones and everything unclean." He didn't leave us with the option of calling him a "good man". He made the biggest claims anyone could have made - "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."
I wish I was a more loving person, so that people could just see Jesus. I can tell you that God is intent on changing that in me. We are all imperfect and we all have differing degrees of uncomfortableness with Jesus. The problem is that I was born wanting to be God in my life. But I've seen where that path leads, and it's not where I want to go.
I can't change what I did or didn't say to my friend. I can only learn from this and hope that going forward my life will be more about Jesus and less about me.